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Galley Hill Primary School, Hemel Hempstead. Galley Hill rated GOOD by Ofsted. Value of the Month - PERSEVERANCE

Monday

Welcome back for another week!!

 

This week we are going to continue to work on your story writing.  Our focus will be editing and presenting your work.

 

Today is editing.  Remember the purpose of editing is to correct basic skills errors and then to improve your work.

 

Begin by reading through your work first.  Make sure that you story is finished.  If you feel it needs finishing off please do that first.

 

Editing - Step 1 - Basic Skills

You will need a different coloured pen to complete your editing.  This makes it easier for you to see when you are working.  It  doesn't have to be green like we use in school simply a different colour pen/pencil will work.  (not felt tips as these are very hard to write with).  Read your work again (it would be handy if you have an adult to help you with this.  If not we have done lots of editing so far this year so just follow the steps below and try your best!)

Check and correct if needed:

  • All sentences begin with a capital letter.
  • All names of people and places use a capital letter. (e.g. Livia, Tranio, Dion, Pompeii, Vesuvius)
  • Sentences are clear.  A sentence should have one main idea unless you have joined two ideas using a conjunction.  Remember only to use one conjunction - there shouldn't be lots of and then.... and then... and then.
  • Make sure that you have left a clear line between your paragraphs.  A new paragraph should happen when you change the time, event, place or person (this is for speech).  If you have forgotten - put a / line with NP to remind you when you present your work that you need to leave the line.
  • Spelling - ask someone in your house to help you with spellings.  You might be able to spot some of your mistakes yourself.

 

Editing Step 2 - Improving/Adding detail

I am sure that as you have written, you have been trying your best to use some interesting descriptive devices to add detail and bring your story to life. 

In this step of editing, pick the section/paragraph that you think needs to be improved the most.  Maybe you feel it needs more detail or that it isn't clear. Write this paragraph out again but improve it. 

To do this you could:

  • Add an extra sentence(s) to give more detail.
  • Add some more descriptive devices (adjectives, prepositions, adverbs of time)
  • Think about the senses - have you given enough detail so that your reader can imagine what it is like to be there?
  • Extend one/some of your sentences using a conjunction if you think more detail will help.

 

When you have completed all of your editing.  Read your story through again but this time the edited version.  Hopefully you will be able to see/talk about how your writing has been improved by taking a closer look at your work.

 

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